A Woman's Self-Esteem

Ask a woman- ANY woman- what she thinks is wrong with herself, and I promise you that she will have many answers. Answers that you may want to roll your eyes to, that you think are absolutely ridiculous- but to her they are real. No matter how beautiful, how successful, how intelligent- I think most women never feel they measure up and don't see themselves the way others see them.

I once was having a similar conversation with someone who I would consider to be "a woman that had it all". To me, she was the epitome of American beauty with "perfect" features, a "perfect" body, and she even seemed to have a "perfect" marriage. When I asked her how she felt about herself, she told me that her knees were knobby, her nose too big, and her laugh too obnoxious. She told me that she didn't enjoy food because she was always terrified that she was eating too much and would turn into the "fat girl" her mother always warned her about. She told me that she learned in school to keep her mouth shut as much as possible after being ridiculed by a teacher for a wrong answer. She was told by her grandmother that women were supposed to be beautiful- not smart, and support her husband, no matter what. Growing up, her best friend's father made her uncomfortable with unwanted attention and comments, and though she was never sexually molested she was made to feel that she should hide her sexuality and that sex was somehow "dirty". Because of this she had never learned to have an enjoyable sex life and it repeatedly caused a rift in her marriage. She even suspected her husband had cheated on her several times over the years, and though it hurt she almost didn't blame him. And she didn't say a word. To the world they portrayed the "perfect" couple and all of her social media posts reflected their "perfect" life, while in reality they hardly knew each other and lived as roommates instead of husband/wife.

Women are amazing creatures. Our capacity for love, our endurance, our inner strength and resilience. But we are also delicate, and very fragile. And when you are kicking your own butt over your own imagined failures, I promise you that the woman who you think has it all is doing the same thing.

I heard a woman described the other day as "a woman who helps straighten other women's crowns". I really like that. That's what this website is about.

You are beautiful. You are amazing. You can do anything you set your mind to. And most importantly, love yourself.